In the world of fetishes, one letter stands erect above all others: S is for sex and all kinds of sexual variations from the fun to the frightening.
S is truly the letter of lust – and the letter of siderodromophilia, which you can feel but you can’t spell.
If you’ve ever felt funny watching Rent-A-Ghost, looking at rumpled clothing or experiencing dark winter nights then this is the instalment for you.
The combination of sadism and masochism. The former is when you get turned on by inflicting pain; the latter when you get turned on by receiving it.
Salirophilia is when you’re aroused by dishevelling or soiling your sexual partner.
That might mean covering them in filth, smearing their makeup or damaging their clothing but never causing harm to the actual person.
A preference rather than a fetish for most: sapiosexuality is finding intelligence a turn-on.
4. Satin fetish
Clothing fetishes are really common, and this is a popular one: it’s a fetish for clothes made from satin or similarly shiny fabrics.
Male nymphomania. As with female nymphomania this doesn’t describe a high sex drive; it’s when a compulsive desire for sex causes real-world problems for the sufferer.
Related to stigmatophilia, which is a fetish for piercings and tattoos, scarification is the practice of modifying the body, usually by cutting, tattooing or using chemicals or heat.
It isn’t necessarily sexual in nature, but the endorphin rush from painful acts means it can be.
As with anything involving wounds, it’s crucial to know what you’re doing and to keep any implements sterile.
Do you get turned on by looking at sexy things such as sexy photos of sexy people doing sexy stuff to one another, or at actual sexy people doing sexy things?
Congratulations! You’re a scopophile! It’s the term for arousal from looking at things.
No, not a fetish for ginger hair, kilts and haggis. Scotophilia is a sexual preference for darkness.
9. Secretary fetish
Fine as a fetish, not so fine if it means sexual harassment in the workplace.
10. Self bondage
Bondage where the person being restrained is the one who does the restraining.
This one should be approached with extreme caution: if there isn’t some kind of automated release mechanism the practitioner can easily end up in trouble.
11. Sensory deprivation
Sensory deprivation in a sexual context is about removing stimulation from one or more senses to make other sensations more powerful.
For example, somebody might wear a blindfold and earplugs to concentrate on the sensation of touch.
12. Sexsomnia / Somnophilia
Sexsomnia is a condition where somebody has sexual activity while asleep. It’s rare and treatable.
Somnophilia is a fetish for having sexual activity with unconscious people. It’s sometimes known as Sleeping Beauty syndrome but if it isn’t consensual, it’s assault.
Are you turned on by Thomas The Tank Engine? You may have siderodromophilia, a fetish for trains: having sex in carriages, getting off on the vibrations or seeing them as sexy in their own right.
A form of feminisation, where men are ‘forced’ to dress in women’s clothes and act in submissive ways.
Sitophilia is arousal involving food, whether that’s feeding strawberries to Kim Basinger or shoving fruit where the sun don’t shine, and we don’t mean Dundee.
It’s only a problem if you find yourself being banned from Lidl.
A subset of sitophilia is ‘sploshing’, where people get off on seeing others covered in messy foodstuffs.
16. Smoking fetish
Exactly what it sounds like. The more society disapproves of the gaspers, the more they garner taboo appeal.
A spectrophile has a fetish for ghosts. Given that ghosts aren’t real you may have to settle for having a partner in a bedsheet jump out of the cupboard shouting ‘boo!’.
If someone is a symorphorphile, there’s a good chance they’ll end up in prison: it’s sexual arousal from staging and watching a tragedy, such as a car accident or a building fire.
It’s something more likely to be found in literature than in real life.