EBN-It has long been believed that a mother’s relationship with her adolescent daughter is based on love and caring. However, things will inevitably change as a result of technological advancements and the introduction of smart devices into our adolescent sons and daughters’ lives.
For a mother to only love and care for her daughter and then let things happen solely on instinct is insufficient. Instead, she needs to restructure her relationship with her adolescent daughter according to new guidelines and principles. What are your thoughts?
Dear mother,Allow fear and love to serve as the foundation for thoughtful behavior and a healthy bond between you and your daughter. At every stage of life, a girl is impacted by her mother, who she looks up to in everything and who she believes has the final say in all of her personal issues.
Learn about the features of adolescence
Adolescence is the period of biological, hormonal, and physical change that occurs in the adolescent. This transformation occurs without a parallel growth in mental abilities.
This stage is accompanied by impulsive behavior and actions on the part of the adolescent, in an attempt to assert themselves through appearance, imitation, and emulation. This may lead to estrangement and unhealthy dialogue between mother and daughter.
Therefore, the relationship with her mother must always be cautious and balanced; that is, the foundations of interaction must be clear. This means that the mother must recognize the seriousness of the stage her daughter is going through, contain her, and monitor her without making her feel it.
Therefore, the mother must become close to her daughter and become a close friend to her, protecting her from the tides of corruption. This freindship will protect and safeguard the daughter, reassuring the mother that she will not lose her relationship with her daughter.
In your relationship with your daughter, combine safe fear with love
A mother’s relationship with her daughter will become tense and they may end up losing each other if she is cold toward her, does not comprehend her emotions and issues, and treats her harshly.
In order to prevent the daughter from deviating, the mother must use the method of openness and honesty to correct any mistakes she finds, either by indirect suggestion or by providing an example and role model.
In this situation, the mother needs to be sufficiently cognizant of her duty as a mother who both loves and fears, who acts and thinks consciously, and who instills in her daughter a safe dread of making mistakes.
Be the firm mother and the gentle, soft mother
- Combine the two extremes: gentleness and softness, and extreme firmness at other times. Tell your teenage daughter about your own situations or problems in an indirect way.
- Pay attention to the physical characteristics of the adolescent girl, which are mature, and her psychological and mental characteristics, which are not yet fully mature.
- Understand that your teenage daughter imitates all your behaviors, despite her fluctuating and hesitant emotions that have not yet matured. Teenagers get angry quickly, calm down quickly, and tend to make friends.
- Be mature, understanding, and broad-minded, and understand any behavior your daughter displays. If she makes a mistake, there is no need for direct, severe punishment, lest she alienate you.
- Do not be distracted from her, do not treat her with harsh, emotionless behavior, and do not treat your children differently, as this will create pathological jealousy among them.
Behaviors you should avoid
First: Avoid violence with your children and marital disputes in front of them, as all of this prevents the formation of a relationship of friendship, love, and understanding between you.
Second: In order to win your daughter’s affection, there must be closeness between you and an exchange of opinions. Provide your daughter with experiences that prepare her as a future mother.
Third: The mother must get to know her daughter’s friends and their families and give the daughter a degree of freedom of choice. If a disagreement occurs, discuss it with her kindly.
Fourth: The state of psychological incompatibility with the mother results in some effects on the daughter, represented by the search for an alternative mother who the daughter may not choose well.
Fifth: The adolescent girl may suffer from many frustrations that lead to depression as a result of emotional deprivation.
Sixth: The adolescent daughter may also deviate morally and develop aggressive impulses towards herself and others.
Seventh: The lack of compatibility may also result in the girl suffering from psychosomatic illnesses such as asthma, skin diseases, and constant stress.
